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The daily

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I’ve never been a big fan of writing posts in advance. I think there’s a rhythm that you get into when you force yourself to write a post every day when ideas just start to come to you. Writing posts in batches gives you the freedom to go do something else for a while but I find that after taking some time off the ideas just don’t come as easily.

I have a bunch of posts kicking around that for whatever reason never got posted when I wrote them. On days when I was feeling really uninspired I would revisit them and then find that each was totally inappropriate for that day for some reason. They just didn’t fit my mood at the time and I’ve always been really consicous and particular about having my blog echo what I’m thinking, even if it’s only me that notices. If this wasn’t a personal blog I would do it differently.

I guess this is my long-winded excuse for not posting the past couple days. I fully intended to write posts the last few days but I don’t keep many in queue and something came up.

Someone said something to me a couple of days ago now that left me feeling pretty sore. This sort of thing doesn’t happen to me often. There’s not a lot that you could say to me that would hurt me at all. I don’t get very emotional about much, but when the floodgates open for good or ill it’s usually scary and debilitating.

I don’t like to post when I’m like that. Inevitably I always regret the departure from my usual calm, thoughtful, introspective self. The past few days I’ve been a little… off and it’s not something I like to show to the world. I’m not entirely sure yet what I’m going to do about the person in question. We’ll see. I’m over it now.

In the meantime, I’m trying to force myself back into posting every day, as well as everything else that I’m supposed to be doing every day: writing, journaling, drawing, yoga, practicing French, meeting some self-imposed deadlines for design work, looking for a job…

You always hear about how the secret to getting good at ______ is just doing it every day, but I suspect that also involves focusing on that thing exclusively. Focus has never been my strong point.

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